Every Time It Rains
by TessaStarDean
Summary: COMPLETE. Starts out FlackAngell, but eventually becomes FlackStella. Our actions have consequences that no one could have predicted.
1. Unclothed

**A/N: I hope my Stack readers will have faith in me that this will turn out right. We all know I have a really hard time with Detective Angell, but I didn't want to demonize her in this fic. And I've finally given into her being called "Jess," since there's a debate about her name. Also, this is slightly AU in the sense that, in this fic, neither Flack nor Angell have any close (immediate) family.**

"All alone, Detective?"

Flack looked up and tried to smile, thought he wasn't sure how successful he was.

"Hey Jess."

Seeing something flash in his eyes, Angell reached out and rested a hand on his shoulder.

"You okay?" she asked.

Don shrugged. "I've been better. Wanna get drunk with me?"

Jess gave him a sad smile. "Best offer I've had all day."

She took a seat next to him, immediately ordering a whiskey. When she saw Flack raising his eyebrows in surprise, she shrugged.

"My prom date senior year was a drinker. Taught me how to hold my liquor."

While the bartender was still there, Flack ordered a refill on his scotch. He usually didn't drink anything harder than a beer, but his only goal for the night was to get hammered.

"So what are we drinking to?" Jess asked as she held up her glass.

Don thought about that for a second. "To knowing you shoulda let go a long time ago but ya still can't?"

Angell clinked her glass against his. "Amen," she muttered.

They both drained their glasses, and Flack gestured to the bartender for another round. Angell took a drink as soon as her glass was refilled, and then leaned back in her chair and sighed.

"He's never gonna leave her, is he?"

Don looked over at his friend, sympathy welling up inside of him. He knew exactly how she felt, and it killed him to watch the light in her eyes die. But as much as he didn't want to see her in pain, he couldn't lie to her.

"No. He loves her, Jess. He's gonna ask her to marry him."

She shrugged. "I guess it serves me right. Never really had a chance to begin with."

"I'm sorry."

She shrugged again, finishing her drink before ordering another. "So what about you? Why the depressive drink-fest?"

He stared hard at the surface of the bar. Angell was his friend - he trusted her with his life and he knew that she would never repeat his secrets. But this would be the first time he'd said it out loud, and he knew that somehow that would make it all the more real. Making his decision, he took a deep breath.

"I hear Mac and Stella are seein' each other now."

There it was. Angell reached out and squeezed his arm, her heart going out to him.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly. "I always thought it might be her."

Flack shrugged, sniffing as he tried to fight back the tears he felt gathering behind his eyes. "Doesn't really matter now."

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They drank late into the night. Neither seemed to care that they had work in the morning, or that they were both well past the point of buzzed or even tipsy. Eventually, though, the noise of the bar started to get to them, and they dropped their money on the counter and headed outside.

Angell was surprised at how unsteady her legs felt. Glancing over at Flack, she was struck by the pain and loneliness in his face. She couldn't let him go home alone to wallow - she couldn't let herself.

"Walk me home?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yeah."

It wasn't a long walk. They slowly mounted the stairs in front of her building, not sure of what to say or do. Angell watched as Don stuffed his hands into his pockets, his eyes downcast. She knew that his hurt matched her own, and she thought that there had to be some way that they could help each other.

Flack shrugged nervously. "Well, I guess -"

She didn't even know what she was doing until she had pressed her lips against his. He froze, caught off-guard, but Jess persisted, kissing him slowly.

"Angell," he murmured when they finally pulled back.

She kissed him again, more firmly this time. "Why should we have to be alone?" she asked.

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Don didn't remember much. There were hands and lips, and clothes hastily discarded. They had barely made it to the bed, but once they had finished, sleep had come quickly.

As morning sunlight filtered into the room, he watched Angell. Her bare back rose and fell with each breath. Flack found himself torn between thankfulness that he had ended up with a friend, and sadness at the way they had just used each other.

"Don't."

He started slightly at the sound of her voice. Angell's eyes opened and she stared at him intently, her expression thoughtful.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Don't over-think this," she explained, holding his gaze. "We're not what the other wants, Don."

"It's that simple, huh?"

Jess shrugged. "Do you have feelings for me?"

"No," he answered firmly. "But...I don't wanna lose my friend either."

She smiled then, looking more relaxed than she had in weeks. "You won't. This happened, Flack. But it won't happen again. We just both needed a little comfort." She tilted her head toward the bathroom. "Now go take a shower. I'll make us some breakfast."


	2. Life

Angell stood in the doorway of the office, watching Stella as she worked. The woman was so strong and confident, and Jess had no trouble seeing why Don was attracted to her. She wished that Stella returned those feelings; she would love to finally see Flack happy. But as her mind wandered back to her discovery earlier that afternoon, she wondered if happiness was in any of their futures. Shaking herself slightly, she stepped into the office, knocking on the open door.

Stella looked up. "Hey Angell."

The detective walked in, shutting the door firmly behind her. "Can I talk to you for a minute?" she asked.

"Of course." She shuffled the papers on her desk and moved them out of the way. "What's up?"

Jess didn't even sit down. "I need to ask you an extremely personal question that's absolutely none of my business."

Stella frowned. "That doesn't sound good."

Angell took a deep breath. "Are you and Mac sleeping together?"

The older woman froze, staring at her. "Excuse me?" she asked, her voice low.

"I don't really think you want me to say it again."

"Why would you even ask something like that?"

"Because that's the rumor that's going around."

The anger went out of Stella's eyes. She took a shaky breath, running her hands through her hair. Angell watched her carefully, trying to read her expression. She though the other woman was genuinely surprised by the question, but she couldn't tell whether she was upset because she'd been caught or because a lie about her was floating around the lab.

"No," Stella finally said, her voice firm and her eyes hard as she looked at Jess. "We're not sleeping together. And we never have."

A part of her was elated for Flack. The rest of her..."I'm sorry. I know it's none of my business."

"You're right, it's not," Stella snapped. Then she took a deep breath. "It's nobody's," she said more quietly. "Thanks for the heads up."

Angell nodded. "If I hear it again, I'll do what I can to quash it."

Stella nodded in response, and Jess knew that it was time for her to leave. With a heart heavier than when she'd walked in, she turned and left the office.

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They were finishing up a crime scene when Angell's phone rang. She answered it, listening to the voice on the other side and replying as quickly and politely as she could.

"Yes, thank you. I'll be there."

Flack was walking beside her, and he looked at her with raised eyebrows as she hung up. She just shrugged, trying to keep her face blank.

"Doctor's appointment after work," she explained. "What about you? Any plans tonight?"

He smiled. "Goin' over to see my nephews in Queens."

"How old are they?"

"Seven and four. They're a handful, but I love 'em."

Her heart slowly sank into her stomach. "Do you want kids, Don?"

He nodded, staring down at the ground. "Yeah, I really do."

She couldn't help it. Her eyes filled with tears and her bottom lip trembled. She closed her eyes, trying ot steady herself, but instead a tear slid down her cheek.

"Jess?" Don asked, reaching out and touching her arm. "What's wrong?"

Looking up at him, she took a deep breath. "Can we...go somewhere and talk?"

He frowned. "Yeah. The Park's just a couple blocks up -"

"That's fine."

They walked on in silence. Angell's head swam as she tried to put her thoughts in order, tried to think of what she would say to him. But by the time they sat down on a bench surrounded by green grass and laughing kids, she knew that the simple truth was her only option.

"I have two things I need to tell you," she said quietly. "First...Mac and Stella aren't seeing each other...I asked her a couple days ago."

She heard him sigh in relief, and it made her stomach knot painfully.

"And I'm pregnant."

That made him stop and stare at her. She forced herself to look him in the eye, and she was surprised at the war of emotions she saw. There was confusion and worry, but there was also...hope.

"Me?" he asked simply, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Yeah."

He nodded slowly, clasping his hands in front of him. "What...Have..." He stopped for a second. "What do you wanna do?"

She forced herself to tell him the truth. "I don't want kids, Don. I have no desire to be a mother." She took a deep breath. "My appointment this afternoon is at the Manhattan Women's Clinic."

Flack closed his eyes, dropping his head into his hands. Angell hated this - she hated that she was hurting him, that she was throwing a wrench into his life. And now she had just told him that she was pregnant with his child, and in the same sentence that she was going to take that away from him. It broke her heart. Reaching out, she ran her hand over his shoulders and felt the shaky breaths that he was taking.

"You want kids," she whispered. "I don't. But maybe...Could you raise this baby on your own, Don? If I go through this pregnancy, and have this baby...are you willing to raise it without me?"

He lifted his eyes, a spark of hope in them. "You might change your mind," he said quietly.

She nodded. "Maybe. But if I don't...will you take it?"

He stared at her for a minute before answering firmly. "Yes."

She took a deep breath, knowing that she had made her decision, for better or worse. "Then I guess we're having a baby."

Flack smiled, but there was still confusion in his eyes. "Why?" he asked.

Jess thought about that. "You're my friend," she finally answered. "I thought it would be easier for both of us to just get rid of it. But I can see it in your face, Don. You want this baby. And I can't take that away from you."

Reaching out, he slowly entwined their fingers, squeezing gently. "Thank you."

All she could do was nod.


	3. Prayers Answered

Danny padded across his apartment, swearing under his breath as someone continued to knock on his door. It was his first day off in what felt like forever, and someone was ruining his sleep by pounding over and over again on his door. But when he opened it and saw Flack standing there in jeans a t-shirt, his hair messy and his eyes downcast, Danny knew that something had to be up.

"I need to talk to you," Flack said quietly.

Without a word, Danny stepped aside, letting his friend in. He glanced at the clock and realized that it was after noon, and he grabbed two beers out of the fridge before joining Don on the couch. They sat there for a long time in silence, just drinking their beer and staring at the floor. Finally, Flack set down his drink and leaned forward, his hands clasped in front of him.

"I'm gonna be a dad."

He nearly choked on his beer. "Excuse me?"

Don sighed. "Jess is pregnant...and it's mine."

Danny stared at his friend in stunned silence. He hadn't even known that the two of them were seeing each other, and now it sounded like it was serious. He groped for something - anything - to say, but his mind was still reeling too much for him to come up with anything coherent. Flack looked over at him, giving him a sad smile as he registered the shock that his friend was experiencing.

"We ain't together, Dan. It was a one time thing...she doesn't want the baby."

"And you?" he asked, unable to get anything else out.

Flack nodded. "I want it. We...we already talked about it. She's gonna do it. She's gonna have the baby and I'm gonna raise it."

Danny's mouth dropped open. "What?"

"She doesn't want kids. Not ever. The only reasons she agreed to this...she said it wasn't fair to take this from me when it's somethin' I want so bad. And I can't let her kill it, Dan. That's my baby. I can't...I'm willin' to raise it alone."

Danny set his beer down and wiped his face with his hands. "Holy fuck."

"Pretty much." Flack looked down, scuffing at the carpet with his shoe. "You think I can do this? For real?"

And that's when he saw it. Don was scared to death - not of raising a child, but of failing it, of signing up for something that he couldn't do. Danny reached out and squeezed his shoulder, waiting until his friend met his eyes.

"Yeah, I do. You're gonna make a great dad, Flack. And I'm here. Whatever you need. You know Montana will be too. We'll even babysit for ya once in awhile."

Don smiled, and relaxed slightly, and Danny knew that he had needed someone else's approval. And now that he had it, he could see how excited his friend was.

"Thanks."

"Anytime. But I ain't changin' diapers. I'm just gonna put that one out there right now."

"Yeah, yeah. Monroe's already got ya domesticated, Messer. It's only a matter of time -"

"Shut up. I ain't the one havin' a baby."

Flack smiled. "Give it time, Messer. Give it time."

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Jess gripped the sides of the toilet as she heaved again. The morning sickness was really starting to get on her nerves, and she wasn't sure how many more mornings like this she could take. She was constantly tired, constantly dehydrated, and she could barely eat anything without throwing it back up. Everything she was going through just confirmed her belief that she never wanted to have kids.

She heard her apartment door open, and she knew that it was Flack. She had given him a key as soon as they had decided they were going through with the pregnancy, and she knew that it had calmed him a bit. He wanted to be there for every second, but both of them knew that moving in together wasn't the solution. So she gave him the key and told him to come by whenever he wanted - it wasn't like she was going to have a social life anytime soon.

Don appeared in the doorway of her bathroom, a plastic bag in his hand. Seeing her on the floor, he was immediately by her side, pushing the hair out of her eyes.

"Hey," he murmured. "You okay?"

She nodded, giving him a tired smile. "This morning sickness is a bitch."

"I'm sorry," he whispered, his eyes full of pain.

Jess reached out and caressed his cheek. "I know."

"I got you some stuff."

As he turned to the bag he had brought, Jess watched him. It was obvious that he was genuinely sorry for everything she was going through - he knew that the only reason she was putting her body through this hell was for him. But as she watched him pull out ginger ale and saltines and the pickles that were really the only thing that didn't make her sick, she knew that she had made the right decision. This man deserved to be a father, and she wouldn't take away his chance at happiness. _Besides_, she thought, _it's adorable watching him get all excited when he thinks about the baby_.

"You think you can eat a little?"

She nodded. "I'm at least ready to try." She pushed herself up off the floor, letting him steady her with a hand as they moved into the living room. Flack immediately opened the pickles and the ginger ale, knowing that she would snack on the saltines when she went to work.

"Did you tell them?" she asked. He nodded. "How did it go?"

"They took it pretty well," he answered slowly, watching her start to eat. "I'd already told Messer, which meant that Monroe knew. Mac told me if we needed anything to let him know and Hawkes said he'd keep an eye on ya."

Jess nodded, watching him carefully as she asked her next question. "And Stella?"

Flack shrugged, avoiding her eyes. "She was quiet."

"Just give her time, Don. It's a lot to process."

"Eh. It's not like she was interested before. So I guess I didn't really lose anything." Cautiously, he reached out and rested a hand on her stomach. "Besides, I wouldn't trade anything for this."

Jess smiled at him, resting her hand over his. "I have to get ready for work."

He nodded, pulling his hand away reluctantly. "Right."

She pushed herself up from the couch, thankful when her stomach didn't flip. "Can you wait for me and drive me in?"

"Of course."

Leaning down, she gave him a soft kiss on the cheek before giving him a serious look. "Even though this isn't what I wanted...there's no one I'd rather be going through this with than you, Don."

He smiled. "Thanks," he whispered.

She patted his cheek and walked towards the bathroom, and Flack wished he could have been able to say the same words to her.

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Stella watched Angell from the corner of her eye. The other woman was questioning witnesses, going about and doing the job that she did every day. But Stella could see the bump beneath her clothing, despite how hard Jess tried to hide it.

It had been just over four months since Flack had broken the news to them, and sometimes Stella still felt like she was reeling. He had explained that they weren't together, but they were having the baby anyway, and she could respect them both for that. She knew that Flack would never let the baby go unloved, and that if they were doing this, he had thought it through.

But she couldn't stop the pangs of jealousy that shot through her as she watched Angell. She had spent years denying how she felt about Don, and just as she had accepted her feelings and prepared herself to tell him, he was having a baby with another woman. Her mind drifted as she remembered talking with Flack a couple weeks before.

_"Alright, Flack. What's going on?"_

He glanced over at her. "What do you mean?"

"You're bouncing on your heels, and you've got this idiotic grin on your face. So spill."

Smiling broadly, he shrugged. "Baby kicked last night."

She forced herself to return the smile, ignoring the pain that jabbed into her chest. "Really? First time?"

"First time I got to be there. It was pretty amazing."

"I bet."  
  
"Well, nobody saw anything, nobody heard anything. Not surprising in this neighborhood."

Stella shook herself and realized that she had been lost in her own thoughts, and that Angell was standing in front of her. Trying to recover, she gave the detective a tight smile. "Well, that's what we have evidence for."

"True. You okay, Stella? You seem distracted."

She nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine." She gestured to the other woman's stomach. "What about you? How are you feeling?"

Jess sighed. "Tired. This baby is sucking everything out of me."

"Do you know yet? If it's a boy or a girl?"

"Are you kidding me? Flack would be running down the streets screaming it at the top of his lungs. We find out in a few weeks."

Stella chuckled at the image, knowing that it was basically true. "Do you have a preference?"

Jess shook her head, her eyes distant. "Nope."

"When's your due date?"

"October fifth."

"You must be so excited."

There was a small pause, and then before Jess could answer, her cell phone rang. Giving Stella an apologetic smile, she pulled it out and answered it. But as she moved away, Stella couldn't help but remember the distant look in her eyes, and the fact that she hadn't answered her last question.

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"Stop fidgeting," Jess ordered.

Flack sat down as the doctor continued the ultrasound. He reached out for Angell's hand as they watched the screen, but she was watching him more than anything else. The childlike wonder in his eyes made her want to cry. The pregnancy had been normal, all the milestones coming at the right time, and Flack had only grown more excited with each one. She knew that he was going to be the best dad, and that he would do anything for the child that he hadn't even met yet. But as many smiles as she faked, as many congratulations as she accepted, she never felt it in her heart. She wanted to - for Don, for the baby - but there was nothing there. She hated herself for it, but Jess just wanted to have the baby and get her life back. She just wanted to move on.

"There it is," the doctor finally announced. "It looks like you're having a girl."

Flack squeezed her hand. "A girl," he whispered.

She smiled back at him, her heart breaking at the tear that fell down his cheek.

"A girl," she echoed.

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"Hey," Stella said when she opened her door and found Lindsay standing there. "What's up?"

"Come on. Let's go."

"Go where?"

Lindsay sighed. "We're helping Flack put the nursery together, remember?"

Stella looked down at the floor, shaking her head. "I don't think I can make it."

"Why? Because you're too busy sitting here and wishing that you were having his baby?" When Stella's head snapped up, Lindsay shrugged. "Please, Stella. I'm not blind. I can see how you feel about him."

She swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry. "What about...does Don...?"

"He's clueless. But regardless of any feelings, Stella, you're his friend. And he needs help right now. So let's go."

When they got to Don's apartment, the two guys were already hard at work putting the crib together. Danny was fighting with the instructions while Flack patiently moved from piece to piece, finding where they belonged and fitting them together. Stella watched him for a moment, smiling when he lifted his head and greeted her. Finally, Lindsay tugged on her elbow and pulled her into the room that would become the nursery. While the boys worked on the crib, they were going to paint the walls lavender.

They were almost done with the second wall when there was a step behind her; Stella turned to see that Lindsay had left, and Don was standing there, holding out a beer for her. Smiling at him, she set her brush down and took it.

"Thanks."

He shrugged. "Thought you might be thirsty."

"How's the crib coming?"

"Almost done. I sent Messer out for pizza. That man cannot build anything to save his life."

Stella laughed at that. "It looked like he was drowning in the instructions."

Don nodded at the walls. "It's comin' along nice." He paused. "Thanks for doin' this, Stell. It means a lot."

She shrugged, brushing off his words. "So how are you doing? With all the baby stuff?"

"It's scary," he admitted. "Only a couple more months and I'm gonna have a kid. I'm gonna be a dad. I've been telling myself that for seven months and it still shocks me."

Stella reached out, resting a hand on his arm. "You're going to be a great father, Don. You already are."

"You think so?"

Setting down her beer, she moved closer, slowly wrapping her arms around him. Flack hugged her back tightly, breathing her in. They stood like that for a long time, and Stella could feel tears building in her eyes.

"PIZZA!"

Danny's voice was loud as it traveled down the hallway, and they jumped slightly as they broke apart. Bending down, Flack picked up her beer and handed it back to her. His fingers brushed against hers, lingering for just a moment.

"Thanks, Stell," he whispered.

She didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

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As far as labors went, hers had been about average. It had hurt, and she had cried, and squeezed Flack's hand as hard as she could as she pushed out their baby. And now Don sat in the chair by her bed, their little girl in his arms as he stared at her in absolute awe. The sight made Jess want to cry again, but not out of love. She was staring at her baby, a living being that had come from her own body, and she didn't feel the overwhelming joy that was supposed to flood a new mother. She didn't long to hold her or stare into the blue eyes that she had most definitely gotten from her father. She just wanted to go home, to sleep in her own bed and to not leave for days.

"Ava Rose," he whispered. "God, Jess. She's beautiful."

"What's wrong with me, Don?" she asked. "Why don't I love her?"

He looked up, seeing the pain in her eyes. Reaching out, he took her hand in his and squeezed it tightly. "Give it time, Jess. Please."

She shook her head. "We had a deal, Flack. I've already had the papers drawn up." She gently touched her daughter's head, letting it linger. "I wanted to love her so badly," she confessed.

Flack sighed, running his fingers through her hair. "I'll sign the papers if that's what ya want, Jess. But you don't have to make up your mind yet."

Closing her eyes, she dropped her hand from Ava's head. "It's better this way," she whispered.


	4. Questions

Flack sighed as he once again looked at the time. It was getting late, and it wasn't looking like he was going to getting out anytime soon. He knew that Danny and Lindsay were in the same boat, and that left him very few options. Arguing with himself, he finally got up and moved away from his desk, knowing that he had to ask.

When he got down to Stella's office, she was already slipping on her jacket. He paused for a moment, wondering once again if this was really his only option. Realizing that it was, he took a deep breath and knocked on her door.

"Hey, Stell."

She smiled at him, buttoning up her coat. "Hey, Flack. What's up?"

"You on your way out?"

"Finally."

"Got plans tonight?"

Stella shook her head. "No. Why?"

Flack took a deep breath. "I got a huge favor to ask."

"Okay."

"I'm stuck here on a case, so is Messer. Monroe's busy with evidence..." He closed his eyes. "I need someone to pick up Ava from the sitter's. I wouldn't ask if it wasn't an emergency, Stell -"

"Don," she interrupted softly. "It's fine."

He opened his eyes, looking at her warily. "You sure?"

She gave him a soft smile. "Of course. I can watch her until you get home."

Flack let out a sigh of relief. "You're a lifesaver, Stell." Fishing in his pockets, he pulled out a spare key. "Make yourself at home, eat what ya want, whatever. Maria - the sitter - she can let ya know when Ava last ate and slept and stuff. There's bottles in the fridge, diapers by the crib..."

"Don. I got it."

"I'll be home as soon as I can. I promise."

"It's really not a problem. Just give me Maria's address and warn her that I'm coming."

Flack finally smiled at her. "Thank you," he said softly.

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Stella wasn't sure what she expected when she picked Ava up from the sitter's. She was a little afraid – of the baby, and of her own emotions. But as soon as Maria placed her in her arms, Stella fell in love. The little girl was absolutely perfect, and even though she could see Angell in her, it was obvious that she looked more like her father. Her blue eyes gazed up at Stella and she was quiet, seemingly trusting that she was safe.

Ava fell asleep on the drive, and only stirred slightly as Stella picked her up and carried her into Flack's apartment. She couldn't help but smile as she saw the clutter on the floor. There was no denying that Ava was living with him – towels and burp rags were piled in the corner, and empty bottles sat in the sink. She could just imagine Flack feeding his little girl, and then walking around the apartment as he burped her. The vision warmed her heart more than she cared to admit.

She carried Ava into the nursery, leaving all the lights off and just clicking on the nightlight by the crib. She knew that she should put her down, but she didn't want to let her go. Instead, Stella sat in the rocking chair by the window and gently set the chair in motion, humming a little tune quietly. An image of Flack doing the same came to her, and once again her heart ached. But even as tears built in her eyes, she smiled down at the baby in her arms.

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The apartment was silent when Flack finally got home. It was well after eleven, and he felt bad for leaving Stella alone with the baby for so long. He frowned when he realized that none of the lights were on, and a stab of fear slammed through him. Slowly pulling out his gun, he moved down the hall, peering into his daughter's room.

He lowered his weapon as soon as he saw Stella sitting there, Ava nestled in her arms. She had a peaceful look on her face as she rocked gently, staring down at the baby. Don could hear faint notes moving across the room, and he knew that she was humming, just like he did so many nights as he watched his daughter sleep.

The sight was beautiful, and it broke his heart. He wouldn't trade Ava for the world, but he wished that this right here was his family, that Stella would put her in the crib and then follow him to bed. Flack sighed – he didn't think that could ever happen now.

He must have made too much noise, because Stella's head snapped up and her eyes met his. Flack holstered his gun and shrugged sheepishly.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to scare ya."

Stella smiled. "It's okay. I should have put her down, but she's just so beautiful."

Walking into the room, Don crouched down beside her, reaching out and running a hand over his daughter's head. "She is, huh?"

She looked at him, softly touching his face. "She looks just like you," she whispered.

He swallowed the lump in his throat. "Thank you," he said quietly. "For doin' this. For watchin' her."

"Anytime, Don," she said, making sure that he saw that she was serious.

Stella slowly stood up, knowing that it was time to put Ava to bed. She set her down in the crib gently, letting her fingers trail down the side of her face before she turned and followed Flack out into the living room.

"Can I ask you something?" she asked after a moment of struggling with herself internally.

"Of course."

Still, she hesitated a moment. "Why couldn't Jess pick her up? I know she wasn't on duty -"

His eyes locked on the floor, Flack shook his head, cutting her off. "Jess can't look after her right now."

"Don -"

"Just let it go, Stell. Please."

He didn't mean to be so abrupt with her, but he couldn't tell her. He couldn't look her in the eye and tell her that Ava's mother wanted nothing to do with her, that she wouldn't even hold her. He didn't want to see the look on her face, the warring emotions. But as the silence loomed, Flack wondered if she was mad at him, if -

"Don?" He looked up when he heard her voice and felt her hand on his arm. "It's okay," she said quietly. "But I'm here. If you need to talk...when you're ready to talk. I'll always be here."

He smiled at her gratefully, his chest constricting at the look in her eyes. Covering her hand with his own, he squeezed it gently. "I know, Stell. Thanks."

She nodded. "I should get going."

Disappointed, but knowing that it couldn't be any other way, he nodded as well. "Thanks again."

"Anytime. And I mean that. You have a little angel there."

"Don't I know it."

Stella stared at him for a moment before reaching up and kissing him on the cheek. "Goodnight, Don."

She turned and walked out of the apartment, shutting the door firmly behind her. Flack leaned his forehead against it for a moment, taking deep breaths as he tried to deal with the conflicting emotions building up inside of him. Finally, he locked the door and moved over to the window, watching as his friend got into her car.

"Night, Stell," he whispered.

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Jess stopped short when she walked into the bullpen and saw Flack sitting at his desk, Ava in his arms. The little girl was almost four months old now, and her was growing in dark and thick. Her eyes were a bright blue, and every time she smiled, it was like looking at a miniature version of Don.

Since signing her over, Angell had done her best to avoid her daughter. As far as she was concerned, she had made her decision, and both Don and Ava were better off that way. But as she stared at her fidgeting in her father's arms, Jess couldn't help but wonder - at what she had given up, at the gift she had turned her back on.

"Jess?"

Shaking herself out of her reverie, she found Flack staring up at her. "Hey," she said nervously. "I thought you had today off."

"Forgot somethin' in my desk." He paused, shifting Ava slightly. "How's it feel to be back on the job?"

She nodded, letting a small smile shine through. "Good. Really good, actually."

"I'm glad."

"What about her?" Jess asked after a few seconds, nodding at Ava. "How are you two?"

Flack nodded. "We're good. She's a good baby, makes my job easier." He swallowed hard before asking his next question. "Do you wanna hold her?"

Jess involuntarily took a step back. "I don't -"

"Look," Don said, standing up. "I know you made your decision, and I respect that. But that doesn't mean you can't be a part of her life, Jess. We won't tell her who you are. You can just...get to know her a little."

She stared at Ava for a minute, taking in her daughter's smiling face. She wanted to hold her, and that realization took her by surprise. Glancing up at Don, she saw the reassuring look in his eyes, and she took a deep breath, forcing herself to take a step forward. Jess reached her arms out, and Flack rested Ava in them gently, smiling as the baby immediately curled up against Angell's chest. Slowly, Jess tightened her hold and closed her eyes, breathing her daughter in. It felt good, and it felt...right. Something inside of her clicked, and Jess opened her eyes to find Don staring at her intently.

"Just give it some thought," he whispered.

She found herself nodding, even as she kissed the top of Ava's head. "Okay."

"Angell!"

They both turned to see Stella walking toward them, a serious expression on her face. Suddenly nervous, Jess handed Ava back to Flack.

"What's up?"

"We got a lead. Let's go."

She nodded. "Okay." Turning to Flack, she gave him a small smile. "We can talk about this later?"

"Of course. Be careful - both of you."

Jess rested a hand on his arm. "Always."

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"So where are we going?" Jess asked.

Stella kept her eyes locked on the road as they drove. "We got a hit on one of the prints found in the hotel room. They belong to a former employee, Raphael Sanchez, in the system for fraud."

"You like him for this?"

The detective shrugged. "He's the best lead we've gotten so far. I hope he's our guy." Stella paused. "How's Ava?"

Jess visibly tensed. "What do you mean?"

"Don told me she had a cold."

"Oh. Right. She's getting better."

Stella heard the tightness in her voice, and she saw the way she gripped the steering wheel. She suddenly wished that she were closer to the woman, that she could get her to open up about what was on her mind.

"What about you?" she finally asked. "How are you handling things?"

"What do you mean?"

Stella could have sworn that there was fear in her voice. Forcing herself to act casual, she shrugged. "Coming back to work, dealing with Ava..."

"I'm fine."

She hesitated slightly. "Jess...you know if you ever need to talk -"

"We're here."

All conversation stopped as they arrived at their destination. Both women pulled out their weapons and moved into the apartment building, cautiously heading up the stairs. They paused outside of 12B, and Stella pounded on the door.

"NYPD! Open up, Raphael!"

Stella never saw him coming. There was a quiet shuffle somewhere down the corridor behind her, and then Angell was grabbing at her, yanking her to the side.

"GET DOWN!" she roared.

She threw Stella down to the ground, just as three shots were fired. The older woman watched in horror as Jess' body jerked in three painful convulsions, the gun sliding out of her hand and clattering to the floor. Seconds later, Angell's body joined it, her lifeless eyes staring at Stella.


	5. Despair

For a moment, all she could see were Angell's empty eyes. It was obvious that she was dead, and the blood from her wounds was slowly seeping towards Stella. Her mind quickly replayed the scene, Angell's voice unbearably loud in her head as she threw Stella to the side, taking all three bullets to the chest.

But the moment passed, and before Stella could take her next breath she was moving. The shooter was taking aim again - this time at her - and she pulled her own gun out, leveling it at his chest. Before he could take the shot, she pulled the trigger, her bullets knocking him back until he fell to the floor with a thud.

Stella's ears echoed with the sound of gunfire even after everything had stopped. Her heart pounding, she pushed herself to her feet, and moved over to the shooter. He was dead, and once she was sure of that, she turned to her fallen colleague. Falling to her knees, she reached out a shaky hand and pushed the hair out of Angell's eyes.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered.

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Once she put the call out, it didn't take long for the cavalry to arrive. She vaguely remembered Mac talking to her, his hands cradling her face as he made sure that she was alright. Then there was Lindsay, and for some reason, Stella's gaze had been drawn to the new engagement ring adorning her friend's finger. It glittered in the sunlight, and she couldn't help but think that it was too bright, too happy, when a cop was dead.

But she brushed past her friends, her eyes scanning the crowd. Her heart rate accelerated eve more - she didn't know how she was going to tell him, how she was ever going to be able to look at Ava again without the weight of what happened...

She turned, and suddenly Don was there, his arms wrapped around her as he held her to him tightly. Stella couldn't stop the tears that fell from her eyes, and she clung to him, dread and guilt lying heavily in her stomach.

"You're alright," he breathed, his face buried in her curls. "They said a cop was shot, and I was so afraid..." He trailed off, slowly pulling back, his eyes searching hers. "Jess?" he asked, his voice tight with fear.

Stella shook her head. "I am so sorry, Donnie," she whispered.

Flack looked like he had been punched in the gut. His eyes went to the building, where Angell's body was being removed. He stared at the black bag in disbelief, his face pale and his hands shaking. Stella reached for him, even though she knew there was nothing she could say that would make this any better.

"Don -"

He pulled away before she could touch him, his face crumbling. Covering his mouth with his hand, he back up, eventually turning and disappearing into the crowd.

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Ava didn't cry, and for that Flack was grateful. Lindsay had shown up with a black dress for the little girl, and the sight of it made his insides twist painfully. He hated that his four-month-old daughter had a funeral dress.

The ceremony was a blur to him. The priest's voice droned in the background as Don's mind replayed the last time he had seen Jess. He remembered the way she held Ava, the way she had kissed her daughter's head. Her words had given him hope that one day she would be the mother he always knew she could be.

But now they would never know. Ava would never again be held by her mother, would never have a chance with her. And Flack hated that; it made him want to scream and cry and break things all at the same time. He had a daughter, though, and he needed to be strong for her. So he kept it all inside, standing up and murmuring "amen" as the service called for it.

Don couldn't keep track of how many people came up to him, offering their condolences. Every face looked the same, all the words identical and hollow. The only thing that he noticed was that Stella never approached him, never came within twenty feet of him. Something about that tickled the edge of his mind, but then Ava shifted in her sleep and he lost the thought.

Finally, they made their way home. Flack wasn't entirely sure of how they got there, but in all honesty, he didn't care, either. He just went through the routine of getting Ava ready for bed. Bringing her into his room, he lay down with her snuggled against his chest, holding her close. She drifted back to sleep easily, clinging to Flack's forefinger. He knew that he needed to sleep as well, but instead he stared into the darkness, silent tears coursing down his face.

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Mac walked into Stella's office, where she was shutting her computer down and slipping on her jacket.

"Heading out?" he asked.

She looked up at the sound of his voice. "Yeah."

He nodded. "Can I talk to you for a minute before you go?"

"Sure."

Mac turned and firmly shut the door to her office. Stella frowned, knowing that it had to be personal and important if he was making certain that they wouldn't be disturbed.

"What's up, Mac?" she asked.

He sighed, taking a few steps closer to her desk. "What are you doing, Stell?"

The question caught her off-guard. "What do you mean?"

"I mean with Flack. You haven't been to see him once since Angell -"

She shook her head, almost violently, her eyes dropping to her desk as she fiddled with some papers. "He doesn't need -"

"Dammit, Stella!" She looked up at his outburst, her eyes wide. Mac took a deep breath and calmed himself. "You're his friend," he said quietly. "One of his closest. He lost an important person in his life and he _needs_ you. I don't know why you're hiding from him, but it needs to stop. You have to go see him, Stella."

Tears filled her eyes, and Stella sat down in her chair, her legs suddenly unable to hold her up. "I can't," she whispered.

Mac frowned and moved closer, pulling a chair over until he was sitting right in front of her. "Why not?"

When she raised her eyes to meet his, they were full of pain and sadness. "It's my fault."

His frown deepened. "What is?"

"Angell's death. She was saving _me_, Mac. She pushed me out of the way and took the bullets that were meant for _me_."

"Oh, Stella..."

"How can I look him in the eye? How can I hold Ava knowing that her mother is dead because of me?"

Her tears were flowing freely now, and Mac stood up, pulling her with him and wrapping his arms around her tightly. Stella buried her face in the crook of his neck, finally letting out the guilt that had been weighing her down. Her shoulders shaking, she clung to him, her cries growing louder as she gasped for breath. Mac just held her, whispering soothing words in her ear as one of his hands ran through her curls.

"It's not your fault, Stella," he murmured. "Jess was a cop - a good one - and she knew the stakes. If you had seen the gunman first, you would have done the same thing."

She pulled back slightly, her eyes red. "But Ava -"

"Has a good father," Mac said firmly. "And a lot of good cops for aunts and uncles. She'll be fine. She's not the one I'm worried about."

Her eyes closed. "Don."

Mac nodded. "He needs your help. He's raising a baby by himself, and I doubt he's let himself really grieve yet."

Stella nodded, taking a deep breath and wiping at her eyes. "I'll go see him."

"Good. Do you need a ride?"

"No. But thank you, Mac. For everything."

He gave her a small smile. "Anytime, Stell. Now go."

She squeezed his arm and turned, walking out of her office.

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His heart leaped into his throat when he opened the door and saw her standing there. Her eyes were red, and he wondered if she'd been crying. "Stella," he whispered.

She gave him a small smile. "Hi, Don."

"What are you doing here?"

"Thought you could use a friend." He stepped aside and let her in, and she glanced around the apartment. "Where's Ava?"

"I just put her to bed."

"Right. It's late, I'm sorry -"

Flack reached out, resting his hand on her bare arm. "Please," he whispered. "Don't go."

Stella smiled, gently taking his hand in hers. "I'm not going anywhere, Don. I promise." She looked around again. "Have you eaten?"

"No."

"Then I'll get dinner started."

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When they were finished eating, Stella quietly got up and put the dishes in the dishwasher. She set it, and then turned to Don, frowning when she saw that he still hadn't moved from the table. Walking back over to him, she rested a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it gently.

"When was the last time you slept?" she asked.

His only response was a weak shrug. Stella squeezed his shoulder again.

"Come on," she whispered. "Let's get you to bed."

Flack nodded, and he followed her down the hall as she flipped off the lights. When they finally got to his bedroom, she leaned over and turned the baby monitor on, so that they could hear Ava if she started to cry.

"Come on," she repeated. "You need sleep."

He stripped down to his boxers and a t-shirt, dully walking over to the bed and climbing in. Stella hated that he was so broken, that he had barely spoken to her since she got there. Switching off the light, she moved to his side, pulling the covers up around him. Flack grabbed her arm.

"Please don't leave."

There was so much pain in his voice, and in his eyes, that she sat down on the edge of the bed automatically. Reaching out, she ran her fingers through his hair, a small smile on her face.

"I told you, Don. I'm not going anywhere. I just...I don't want to intrude."

He tugged on her arm. "Lay down," he whispered.

The request surprised her, but she knew that this was about what he needed. Getting up, she slipped her blouse off, leaving a thin tank top on, and then stepped out of her shoes before she made her way to the other side of the bed. She hesitated just for a moment, but then she remembered the pleading in his face, and she climbed in, letting herself lie close to him. Flack turned over on his side so that he was facing her, and he once again rested his hand on her arm.

"Thank you," he said quietly.

Stella rested her hand on his. "You're welcome."

"I've missed you," he said after a minute of silence. "I thought you would have come sooner."

She closed her eyes, fighting back tears. "I'm sorry, Don," she said, refusing to look at him. "I thought -"

"You thought what?"

When she didn't answer, Flack reached over and pulled on her until she turned on her side to face him.

"Talk to me, Stell," he urged.

"I thought...I was afraid you blamed me," she whispered.

He frowned, not understanding. "For what?"

She opened her eyes, finally looking at him. "For Jess," she answered, her voice barely audible.

Flack stared at her in disbelief. Reaching out, he ran his fingers through her dark curls and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "No, Stell. How could you think that?"

"She took those bullets for me, Donnie. It should have been me -"

He immediately wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tight against his body. "No," he said firmly. "No. She was doin' her job, Stell. You can't blame yourself for that."

"I'm so sorry," she whispered.

He held her for a long time, his eyes closed as he breathed her in. Just the feel of her in his arms was making him feel better, and he hated that she had been wracked with guilt. Not once had he blamed her for Jess' death, and he didn't want her carrying any of that.

"I'm sorry," she said again, though her voice was stronger now. "I'm supposed to be the one comforting you."

Flack chuckled lightly. "You are."

Stella let her arms wrap around his waist, and she rested her head on his chest. "Did you love her?" She closed her eyes, shaking her head. "I'm sorry. That's -"

"No," whispered. "I didn't love her. But she was a good friend, Stell. And she gave me Ava."

She nodded. "Why...how did you two...get together?"

He shrugged. "We met up at the bar one night. We were both upset...it just happened."

"Did she love you?"

He gave her a sad smile. "Nah. She was in love with somebody else. Somebody she couldn't have."

Stella frowned. "Who?"

Flack looked at her for a moment. "You can't tell anyone. Ever."

"Of course."

He took a deep breath. "Danny."

Stella's eyes widened as she stared up at him. "What? How long?"

"A long time. They were pretty good friends, Stell, and when he and Monroe had that rough patch, she helped him through it. Convinced him to fix things. Ironic, actually."

She rested her head back on his chest. "That must have been so hard for her. With them getting engaged."

He nodded. "She was dealin' though."

"How did she feel about Ava?"

Stella felt him stiffen next to her. "What do you mean?"

She paused, putting her words together carefully. "It seemed...she was distant, Don. I only saw her hold her on...that last day and -"

Don sighed, closing his eyes. "She didn't want her."

"What?"

"Ava. Jess didn't want a baby. Ever."

Stella frowned. "Then why -"

"She knew I wanted kids. So when she got pregnant, we made a deal. She'd have the baby, if I agreed to take full custody."

Several things clicked into place, and Stella suddenly understood all the nuances and little glances that had happened over the past few months. She reached out, caressing Don's face.

"She was very brave," she whispered.

He nodded, the tears filling his eyes. "I miss her, Stell."

And then he finally broke. The sobs came over him and his shoulders shook as he finally grieved for his friend. Stella held him closely, offering him whatever comfort she could.


	6. Answers

**A/N: The song is "Zoe Jane" by Staind, though the words have been slightly tweaked.**

Stella's eyes fluttered open, and she frowned as she tried to figure out what had woken her. Turning over, she saw Flack lying next to her, and her frown faded. She was glad that she had finally come over, that the two of them had been able to talk. Reaching out, she gently ran her fingers over his face - he looked so peaceful when he slept, and she knew that he needed the rest.

A sound reached her ears, and Stella came fully awake. Slipping out of bed, she went down the hall to Ava's room. The little girl was awake, her bright blue eyes staring at Stella as she came over to the crib.

"Morning, baby girl," she said with a smile. "What are you doing up?"

She reached in and lifted Ava up, cradling her against her chest as she gently kissed the top of her head. They moved over to the changing table, and Stella put a fresh diaper on her, all the while talking and smiling with her. Last night, she hadn't been sure if she could ever look at Ava again without a crushing guilt bearing down on her. But after her talk with Don the night before, she found it much easier. If he could forgive her, then maybe Ava could as well.

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When he first woke up, Flack experienced a momentary panic. The other side of the bed was empty, and he worried that Stella had left without saying anything. But then he heard the sound of her voice coming down the hall, and he smiled, sliding out of bed.

She was standing by the window of the nursery, Ava in her arms. Flack leaned against the door frame and watched them, amazed at how happy his daughter was in Stella's arms. A sharp pang shot through him as he had a vision of Jess standing there, but it slowly faded. His earlier anger at what Ava had lost had turned into a dull sadness; she might never be held by her mother again, but she would certainly never be without love.

"Mornin'," he finally said.

Stella turned, a big smile on her face. "Hi. Sorry - we didn't mean to wake you."

"Don't worry about it." He walked over to them, kissing Ava on the head. "You two hungry for breakfast?"

Stella nodded. "Yeah, I think we are. And she's clean - I just changed her."

"You didn't have to do that."

She shrugged. "I just wanted to help."

"Thanks." He paused, his face growing serious. "I'm really glad you came, Stell."

"About that..." She paused, looking down at the ground. "I was thinking...maybe I could stay for a couple days. Help you guys get back on your feet."

He looked at her carefully. "You sure? I mean, you don't have to -"

"It's okay, I mean...if you'd rather I left -"

He reached out, grabbing her arm like he had the night before. "I'd love for you to stay."

She smiled at him in relief. "Good. Let's go make breakfast then."

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Stella juggled the pizza box and her purse as she unlocked the door to Flack's apartment. He had given her a key the second day she was there, despite her objections.

"Doesn't matter how long you're stayin'," he insisted. "I want you to always be able to get in."

And now it was two weeks later. Stella knew that she should leave, let Don and Ava get back to their normal lives. But truth be told, she didn't want to go. She and Flack had fallen into a routine, and it was really starting to feel like they were a family.

The lights were on as she stepped inside, but Don was nowhere in sight. Glancing at the clock, Stella grimaced - she knew she was late. She hoped the pizza would serve as a peace offering for forgetting to call.

Setting everything down in the kitchen, she moved down the hall in search of father and daughter. They were right where she expected them to be - Flack sitting in the rocking chair by the window, and Ava snuggled in his arms. The news had warned of an incoming storm, and dark clouds were starting to cover the sky. The room was hidden in shadow, and Flack's face was only illuminated by the pale and fading light from outside.

He hadn't noticed her yet, and Stella used the opportunity to lean against the door frame and watch them. She knew that Flack had been nervous about being a father, but he was a natural and she loved watching him care for his daughter. As she continued to stand there, a faint sound came to her, and she realized that Flack was singing Ava to sleep. Willing her body to keep still, Stella strained to hear the words.

_Well I want you to notice__  
To notice when I'm not around__  
And I know that your eyes see straight through me__  
And speak to me without a sound__  
__  
I want to hold you__  
Protect you from all of the things I've already endured__  
I want to show you__  
Show you all the things that this life has in store for you__  
I'll always love you__  
The way that a father should love his daughter__  
__  
When I walked out this morning__  
I cried as I walked to the door__  
I cried about how long I'd be away for__  
I cried about leaving you all alone__  
__  
I want to hold you__  
Protect you from all of the things I've already endured__  
I want to show you__  
Show you all the things that this life has in store for you__  
I'll always love you__  
The way that a father should love his daughter__  
__  
Sweet Ava Rose...__  
Sweet Ava Rose...__  
__  
So I wanted to say this__  
Because I wouldn't know where to begin__  
To explain to you what I have been through__  
To explain where your daddy has been__  
__  
I want to hold you__  
Protect you from all of the things I've already endured__  
I want to show you__  
Show you all the things that this life has in store for you__  
I'll always love you__  
The way that a father should love his daughter__  
__  
Sweet Ava Rose...__  
Sweet Ava Rose...__  
__  
_The song came to a close, and Stella knew that there were tears running down her cheeks. Don never ceased to amaze her, and she could actually feel his love for Ava coming out of him as he sang. He glanced down at his daughter and, seeing that she was asleep, he got up and laid her down gently in her crib. His fingers lingered over her face before he turned toward the door, stopping when he saw Stella standing there.

"Hi," she whispered.

"Hey," he replied, smiling at her as he ushered them both out of the room. "What's wrong?" he asked, noticing her tears.

Stella shook her head. "Nothing. I just...that was really beautiful, Don. That song."

He shrugged, clearly embarrassed. "Just don't let it get around that I sing, okay?"

"Your secret's safe with me."

They moved into the kitchen, and he saw the pizza. "What's this?"

"Dinner." She rolled her eyes. "A peace offering. I'm so sorry I'm late. I should have called -"

"Stell?" When she stopped, Flack smiled at her. "I called Danny two hours ago to make sure you were okay. I know how you get when you're wrapped up in a case." He looked at the pizza again. "The food helps, though."

"Well, I'm glad. And I still should have called."

"No more sorrys," he ordered. "It's dinner time."

Stella beamed at him. "Now you're talking."

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"I think this might be the cutest thing I've ever seen," Stella said.

Lindsay smiled as she looked at the dress in her friend's hand. "It really is," she agreed. "Do they have it in Ava's size?"

She thumbed through the rack. "Here it is!" Pulling it out, Stella stared at it. "Do you think I should get it for her?"

"Why not? She'll look adorable in it."

"I just...I don't want to overstep my bounds."

"I don't think you are," Lindsay told her. "I mean, you're practically living with them -"

Stella held up a finger. "I'm staying with them," she corrected. "Just for a few -"

"Days? Come on, Stella. You've been there for almost a month now. And I've never seen Flack so happy." She paused. "Maybe you should tell him how you feel."

The older woman shook her head. "It's too soon for that."

"Why? He's not a grieving widower, Stella. the two of you deserve to be happy, and Ava deserves a whole family."

Stella froze, staring at her friend. It hadn't occurred to her that she might be taking Jess' place in Ava's eyes. Her chest constricted as she wondered what kind of woman that made her, if she was taking advantage of the situation.

"You okay?"

She shook her head, clearing her thoughts and forcing a smile on her face. "Yeah, I'm fine. Let's go check out."

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"Yeah, hi. I need to order some lilies. They're for a headstone."

Stella stopped near the door to the nursery when she heard Flack's voice. She had gotten home earlier than expected, and they didn't know that she was there. Glancing into the room, she saw Don getting Ava dressed while he talked on the phone.

"Yeah, I'm still here...When can I come get 'em? That's fine. Thanks."

He hung up the phone and smiled at his daughter. "You ready, Ava?" he asked. "Come on, let's go visit your mommy."

Moving before they could see her, Stella stepped into the bathroom and shut the door. tears filled her eyes as she leaned back against the hard wood, and she let them fall down her cheeks. _Who am I kidding?_ she wondered. She had taken another woman's family and almost believed that it was her own. Angell had sacrificed her body and her life so that Don could be happy, and Stella had no right to claim it for herself. Sighing, she wiped at her eyes - it was time for her to go home and back to her own life.


	7. Don't Leave

**A/N: This is the end. Thank you so much to everyone who read and reviewed. I got a lot of positive feedback from you guys, and I'm glad that you all enjoyed it so much.**

"Hey, Jess."

Flack spread a blanket out on the ground and sat down in front of the headstone, Ava in his lap. It was a cool autumn day, and he was glad that he had bundled her up.

"Sorry we're late this week. Me and Stell took Ava to the zoo yesterday. I got ya some flowers, though. They should be ready in a couple days." He paused, taking a deep breath. "I miss you. I miss talkin' to ya, and seein' ya...And I wish Ava woulda gotten to know you better. I really think you coulda been a great mom, Jess, if you'd just had more time..." Tears built up in his eyes and sniffed. "She's real good with Ava. Stell, I mean. You shoulda seen 'em at the zoo, Stell explainin' all the animals and stuff to her...and Ava's whole face lights up when Stell comes into the room. I think...I think we could be a family, the three of us.

I don't wanna replace you, Jess. But...you're gone, and Ava deserves a family. And I love Stell - you know that. And I'm startin' to think...maybe she could love me too. But we'll make sure she knows you...there's already a picture of you in her room. She'll know that you were her mom - I promise you that."

He sniffed again and slowly stood up, cradling Ava to his chest. "I just...I guess I miss talkin' things over with you. But we'll be back next week, okay?"

Don stared at the grave for a minute longer and then nodded, having said everything he came to say. Pressing a kiss to Ava's head, he held her closer and turned around, walking back up to the car.

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When Flack got home, he took Ava right into the nursery, knowing that she needed to be changed. The visit with Angell had cleared his head, and he thought that maybe he was ready to have that talk with Stella. With the baby changed and her eyes starting to flutter shut, he walked them both down the hall and into his bedroom.

He stopped cold when he saw Stella standing at the foot of the bed, putting her clothes into a bag. His mouth opened and he tried to speak, but nothing came out as his chest constricted painfully. He was too late.

He must have made some noise, because Stella raised her head and gave him a small smile. "You're home."

Flack nodded, swallowing hard. "What are you doing?"

She looked down at the bag. "I just...this was only supposed to be for a few days. It's probably time I left, let you guys get back to normal."

He nodded again, not knowing what else to do. "Yeah. Right."

Glancing down, he saw that Ava had fallen asleep on his shoulder. Turning, he walked out of the room and back into the nursery, setting his daughter down in her crib. With a shaking hand, he pushed her hair back, tears building in his eyes.

He knew that the only thing holding him back was fear. It choked him, the thought that she didn't feel the same, that if he asked her to stay, she would gently let him down. But if he let her go, he knew that it would be even easier to let the fear take hold, that he might never tell her how he really felt.

Staring down at his daughter, he thought of Jess. If she were still alive, he knew he'd be calling her up, begging her for advice. But even though she was gone, he could still hear her voice, and he knew what she would be telling him. Everything he wanted was right within his reach – and if he didn't take the chance, he'd have no one to blame but himself. Taking a deep breath, he left the nursery and walked back into his room.

"You could stay."

Stella's head snapped up. "What?"

"You could stay," he repeated more slowly, taking a step towards her. "With me and Ava. For good."

She swallowed hard. "For good is a long time, Don."

"I wouldn't be offering it if I weren't willing to give it."

He was surprised to see her face crumble, tears filling her eyes as her trembled. "You're not mine," she whispered. "And I keep forgetting that."

He moved closer, his hands in his pockets as he fought back his fear. "We could be," he said quietly, finally raising his eyes to hers. "We could both be. If you want us."

Stella reached out, touching his face softly. "Really?"

Flack smiled, resting his forehead against hers. "Remember I told you why Jess and I got together? How she was upset about Messer?"

She nodded, frowning in confusion. "Yeah."

"That was only half the story. The reason I was there...I heard that you…that you were with someone. And it hurt. I've been head over heels for you for a long time, Stell." He paused. "And havin' you here...we could be a family, couldn't we?"

More tears fell, but her smile widened. "I want us to be."

"Then we are," he whispered.

Leaning in, he kissed her softly. Stella wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him back, sighing against him. Flack angled his head, taking it deeper, amazed at how good it felt to finally have her in his arms. No matter what he had imagined in all the time he'd wanted her, nothing compared to the real thing.

When they finally pulled back, both breathing heavily, Flack looked at her with hopeful eyes. "Does that mean you'll stay?"

Stella smiled. "Yeah, Donnie. I'll stay." She kissed him again. "Is Ava napping?"

"Yeah. Why?"

She grabbed her bag and tossed it onto the floor. "I was thinking maybe we could take a nap, too."

Don grinned. "I like that idea."

He climbed into bed after her, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close.

"Don?"

"Yeah?"

She played with the collar of his shirt. "I love you."

His smile widened as he kissed her again. "I love you too, Stell."

Resting her head against his chest, Stella listened to the beating of his heart, letting the sound slowly melt away all the tension she had been feeling. Flack watched her as she slowly sank down into sleep, his fingers running through her dark curls. It had taken him a long time to get there, but he felt like he had gotten everything he wanted - and he was finally home.


End file.
